Quarterlife Mocha Girl

Monday, November 24, 2008

What a Difference a Year Makes

This time last year, I was probably pacing the floor of Baptist Memorial Hospital hoping my Daddy would be the same Daddy I knew before his stroke. God, it seems just like yesterday that our lives were turned upside down. Time does fly though.

Now, Daddy is okay. Doing just fine, physically though he still has some speaking issues due to the stroke. I can't complain at all. Thank God for that!

This time last year,

This time last year I was still dodging the youngin and about to be reunited (?) with That One again unexpectedly. Never varying from the script, he disappeared from my life some months later and now I'm shamefully still hoping to see him this weekend so I can get some some ish out. There's a song on I Am...Sasha Fierce called "Disappear" that sums it up completely!

I know I'm going on off a tangent, but....It's not fair. Just when I think it could be something with another guy who could possibly OVERshadow him, it flops. For several reasons, I guess, but it all comes down to it not being meant to be. Oh well.

This post has no direction whatsoever. Sorry! I'm actually trying to work and I didn't get much sleep last night!


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Taking On Pain

It's been a long time, right? I'm kinda sorta down from my Obama high, still working hard and sleeping less (ugh!). I guess it's time to post. Last weekend, my Mama finally came over my house just to visit and chill for the first time in a year and half. We watched The Secret Life of Bees (yes, the bootleg!). The sister, May, who felt everyone's pain and emotions, I found is somewhat similar to me.

Have you ever said you love someone, but didn't realize that you really meant it until something terrible happened? Case and point: One of my church members--my Sunday School teacher (when I would go), our youth advisor--- passed last week. She was only 40 years old. My church family is really a family. We have disagreements, but overall, we're fairly close. This woman was so many things to us, the young adults, and especially the kids. She was a confidant, a comedian, a Bible Study teacher, everything. Just a good, Christian woman. She had three children, all teenagers. The funeral was pretty sad, yet good (if you know what I mean).

When I saw her only daughter cry uncontrollably and almost fall to the ground, my heart broke in two. I felt her pain deep, deep inside. Almost as if it were me on that pew. All day and even before then, I prayed day and night for God to be the comfort that they need. I know He will be.

So, I guess that means I really love those kids and I loved their mother. When you love someone, you feel their pain and what they're going through. But another day has come and I have a reassuring feeling that God is going to make everything alright. I hope in due time, they get that feeling, too.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

November 4, 2008: A Moment in History

I'm sitting here, still in awe.

Senator Barack Obama is now President-Elect Obama. I have never cried so much (maybe once or twice), but NEVER over an election. He won fair and square. To look at him, a Black man, proud, strong, fearless and humble all at the same time...it's just indescribable.

For all of the men and women who fought and died to have equality, to vote, to even drink out of the same water fountain as others, today is their day. For everyone, young and old, babies and our children who are yet to come, today is their day, as well. History has been made and once that happens, it can't be taken back.

As much as I'd like to write something eloquent and tear-jerking, I can't. This time, not even my writing ability will allow me to share what I'm feeling right now.

But there's something to be said about God having His hand on you. No trickery, deceit or obstacles can hold you back from what He has destined for you. Earlier today, I was angry. About our history, why we had to be enslaved, treated as second-class citizens, why we have to, even today, prove ourselves twice as much as the next person. Why after 400+ years are still oppressed in some ways?

God gave me my answer tonight. Our time is not His time. When the elections were stolen in 2000 and 2004, when attacks were against us on every hand, God was using that to set up this victory that we have right now. He proves daily that everything that happens is a part of His divine will and perfect plan. I believe that.

So even though we have claimed this glorious moment in history, I (and hopefully, you too) will be patient for the CHANGE that is sure to come. I will keep my ancestors' sacrifices in mind when things get rough. I will remain a proud American and African American.

I will never forget God's promises to His people.