New Honey Post Up: It Is What It Is

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Honey Beehive Blog: Memphis

Management

Aggravation

This will be short because my attention span isn't that long today. Any day for that matter. The level of aggravation is soaring to new found heights today. For what? I don't know. Whatever is going on with me must stop. The personal life, work (the roomie), traffic--they all are breaking me down. It's time for prayer followed by Riesling!

Let me tell what's getting on the nerve at this moment. People whose favorite quote to live by is, "But I don't know how to do it (so I'll just get everybody else to do it.)." In my lazy days, a bitchy, yet helpful boss told me, "if you don't know how to do something--ask! Don't use other people and other things as crutches." I took heed and now I totally understand where she was coming from. I realize that most people never want to apply themselves to do even the simplest of things because of fear. It's too challenging or too complicated.

You have to learn and apply things on your own sometimes. I'm not talking major things like taxes (although you can get up on that TurboTax) or anything like that. This is what I'm dealing with right now: Nevermind that I had to spoon feed the directions on how to use the postage machine to a co-worker for the 90th time. Or that she had questions about 401k distributions. Questions, questions, questions! I'm the first one to help out, but damn. Let me just sit here and be. Figure it out on your own.

Okay! Enough complaining for me. I just had to get that out. I'm at peace now. Woo-sah!

Straight From the Horses Mouth (or something like that)- SUEDE MAGAZINE MAY BE COMING BACK!!!

It's all love in magazineland (or atleast it should be). Sisters help sisters. Thanks Dede Sutton (creative director of Clutch Magazine)! I'm too excited!!

Via Forwarded Email:

Suede Devotees:

So... I have heard through a very reputable grapevine, that our beloved suede is possibly set to take the stage for a comeback.... i know, i know... be still your diamond studded hearts.... it will not come without some assistance from the unrequited (that's us) ...

Please send your love letter for love lost to Veronica Wilson, Nat'l Advertising Director at Essence. She has regular meetings with the top brass regarding the pub, and by her estimation they seem open to bringing the glossy glam guide back --- but it will not be without an out pour of visible support from savvy fashion conscious sincere ad pro's like - - you guessed it, YOU! Even if you work for another book - DON'T BE A HATER- We'll make room on media budgets for all great titles!Tell your friends to put it on their blogs, and forward the link to me so that I can share it with Veronica as well. She shares all of the support with Time Inc, so that they know just how badly consumers and media folks alike want to see this book back on the shelves...

Send your email to Denitria Lewis at Dnlewis@gmail.com. Please title your email "WHEN IS SUEDE COMING BACK??!" She is patiently waiting... It's up to us. Let's make media history. They've (the man) done it for TV Shows (not black ones though... that's another issue) we can do it for OUR magazine...

Alright ladies, let's get to it!

Look At What I Found

What's shakin'?

Since I had absolutely no life this weekend, I hung out at Barnes and Noble for a spare. I scoped out the magazine section to see if there were any other magazines that I was missing out on. To my surprise, I found quite a few:

Colures Magazine


"Colures magazine is an upmarket glossy publication aimed at style conscious and intelligent women of colour. "

This magazine is breathtaking! With Miss Jackson gracing the cover, it's second issue, the magazine is glossy and targets all women of color. It's published in London. It was really great to see not only African Americans, but Africans, Latinos and others featured in the publication. The other great thing about it was it spoke to not only women in London and abroad, but to Americans, as well. It's on my list.

Pride Magazine


Ok, I can't lie. I actually saw this magazine posted on another site maybe a month ago, but I didn't think they published it in the US. Pride is a British publication that focuses on multicultural women. You can find them online, as well.

NV Magazine

"NV magazine's mission is to educate, inform, inspire and entertain today's most exciting and successful generation; urban professionals, entrepreneurs and forward-thinkers. NV reflects the energy, style and vision of today's young professionals. While respecting older generations, we forge ahead by looking at each other as role models as we acquire the tools that will help us accomplish our goals. NV magazine is the forum that brings intelligent journalism and practical information to its readers, with a hands-on mix of business and style."

I can't believe I forgot about this one! NV (New Vision in Business) is a sleek, urban multicultural business magazine. This month's issue is the 5oth issue. I love to see magazines grow. I think NV has swagger.

After my magazine binge, I thought about former Honey/Teen People editor, Amy Dubois-Barnett's new book, Get Yours!: The Girlfriend's Guide to Having Everything You Dreamed of and More.




I LOVE books like this, especially when the author is one who is doing what I want to do. I have been following Ms. Amy since my first subscription to Honey, so her track record is pretty damn good. It was released today! Read about it over at Clutch.

And lastly, not magazine-related news, Forever 21 has a new high-end spin-off line, Twelve by Twelve. The site launched today and the pieces don't look too bad. Check it out.

Toodles!

Friday Morning Fun

Hey Kids! It's Friday...what more could I ask for? Maybe being on camera looking a hot mess? Yep!

Last night, I attended revival at church. I haven't been to a revival since I was atleast 10 years old, but it was excellent. All I can say is "it is what it is." Amen. So, after a good word and some good popcorn shrimp from Popeye's (so country!), I had a good sleep. It was so good, I didn't wake up until 7:45 a.m. I need to be out of the house, on my way to work at 8 a.m. Obviously, I rush and throw on jeans (because it's Casual Friday) and a snuggly white t-shirt, a black necklace and hoops. My hair? Forget about it. I have an appointment today. Something wasn't right though. I had this premonition that I was a tad too casual, even though I was appropriate. I blew it off because NO ONE was going to be in the office. Neither boss. Just me and the roomie. FREE DAY!

Just as I'm getting into my routine of checking Gmail, blogs, Facebook, etc., I get a call from my boss. What do you know, a reporter is coming to do an ON-CAMERA interview with me about FICO credit scores. Tell me I'm dreaming. I looked like I just woke up. The hair is pure tomfoolery. Again, I say, I'm dreaming, right?

It was real and my nightmare became a reality. Now I'm all about on-camera interviews. It is what I did for a living in the previous job. My old boss told me if you stay ready you won't have to get ready. Meaning, keep a blazer or suit jacket in the office, along with some makeup and a pair of conservative earrings. I was always on point.

Here? All I do is sit and research until I do a class, in which I'm always appropriate. I'm sorry, but it didn't list in-house spokesperson in my job description. So who's at fault? No one, I guess. Me, maybe? Thank God for Walgreens being right behind my building. I ran over and bought some cheap eye shadow and eyeliner, you know to open my eyes up. And I picked up a pair of "crystal" studs for $2. I can't say the hair was the bomb. Actually it looked like a bomb hit it, but the reporter said I did a good job.

What a morning. I guess I be keeping the makeup and studs here and bringing a blazer to hang up.

The Candy-Snatchers

Maybe...just maybe I'm PMSing, but I doubt. I felt the same way two weeks ago. Please, check the foolery...

My office is small. The facility, as well as the number of people on staff. I guess it's the age-old stereotype of a non-profit. If you don't have an office with an actual door, be prepared to have your business on Front Street. Phone calls, whether business or personal become common knowledge. That includes conversations about refraining from using birth control or hormone pills, fertility treatments or cocktail socials which turn into pissy-drunk socials with in-laws. All this from either my co-worker whom I share an office with (I call her my roommate) or the I Know Every-damm-thing chick across the hall. Sweet when she wants to be, but sometimes, I just.don't.get.her. I think it's meant to be.

Okay, that's the set-up.

Anyway, we have several "committee" meetings with board members, community leaders, etc. frequently around here. A couple of weeks ago, a meeting was held with a committee chair who happens to love chocolate candy, apparently. So Miss Know-it-all (who is the undercover president assistant) stocks up on all kinds of candy: Reese's, Mini-Snickers, Rolos (yeah, I said it), Twix, Hershey's Kisses, etc. Needless to say, after the meeting, there were bags and bags left, unopened.

Usually, they put the candy out in the conference because even though it's only eight people in here, tops, the candy is a goner. Waste not, want not, right?

My roommate asked MKIA where the candy was and she says, "Oh, it's in my drawer."

Huh? Why the hell is it your drawer? Do you plan to drown yourself in chocolate for the next millenium?

Before you think I'm being petty, check out her rationale. "Well, everytime we put out candy, it just disappers so fast. People just ravish it...Uughh! So I'm keeping it in my drawer."

WTF? Am I missing something here? So you just plan to let it "sit" there without dipping in? Gimme a break like Nell.

Who died and made you the Office Candy Lady? Maybe I'm trippin. And not because I want some of the candy. It's not like it's full-size candy. Beat it, chickadee!

So....

Weeks later after she told "a few" people about the stash, she comes in here to say, "Oh my God, can you believe it? Before I left last week, there was ENTIRE bag of Snickers and today, they're gone! This UN-believable! Why does this keep happening?"

A full-fledged bitch-fit...about....Snickers! Buy some more with the COMPANY (not personal) credit, along with a life!

I be damned if she think it was me (because it wasn't!). Like we're still slaves running to the bottom of the basement steps to swallow mini-Snickers whole. Beat it, lady!

Must be the invasion of the Candy Snatchers....

When a Woman's Fed Up: Bringing Children Into the Hurt

"Christian's got two beautiful sisters. He ain't thinking about that other one, trust me when I tell you. And I don't play that. That situation is over there, and this is over here and I ain't got nothing to do with that."
--Kim Porter on son Christian meeting HIS HALF-SISTER

[Quote via RHYMESWITHSNITCH // Scan CREDIT Urban Scanz
-Crunk and Disorderly

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can't say I'm happy about this one. Yes, I'm glad Ms. Stand By My Man grew a brain and bounced on Diddy Bop, but this statement further proves her ignorance. Let me explain.

I am one of those children whose father has other children. Actually, my father has one son with a woman and a son and daughter from a previous marriage. I'm the baby. While I can't say that the way I met each of them was "magical" (The experiences were quite weird, but a blessing, nonetheless.), I'm glad that I know who my brothers and sisters are. Are we close, super-tight? No. Do we talk everyday? No. But we do see each other regularly, occasionally talk by phone, I spend time with my nieces and nephews and when we see each other out on the town, it's all good. No ill feelings. For God's sake, we look alike!

Don't get me wrong, we didn't all come together with all parents for an official "meet and greet" like Eddie's baby mamas. They were all adults by that time. However, I find comfort knowing that I have some piece of a relationship with three other people in world who share my last name (it's not that common!). I know that if I needed anything, they'd be there. The same goes for them.

All of that to say Kim Porter is DEAD WRONG! How dare she deny her children the right to know their sibling simply because the "other woman" is involved? Get over it, chick! You didn't have enough guts to stand up to Sean John all those years, so don't try to be tough now. You're using the children. Most times, it's the mother who pushes her negative feelings about the "other" children and the "other" woman onto the child. Speaking from personal experience, a child always wants to know their siblings, whether they admit it or not. How can you not? The fact is, the same blood runs through your veins and whether or not your mothers or circumstances are different doesn't change that. There is something in each of you that is the same--a physical feature, a personality trait, a look, a smile, something. Who wouldn't be in awe of that?

So this is my plea and prayer for mothers like Kim and millions of others and even adults who have siblings whom they refuse to meet: GROW UP! Be what you are---an adult. Pray to God for closure in the situation and for your heart to open. There's a way to deal with your hurt, betrayal, jealously or whatever issue you have and make connections with your family. It just takes TIME. It doesn't happen overnight.

Even after meeting years ago, sometimes my sister and I just sit in the living room and look at each other. There's nothing much to say, but we know that we are a part of each other. That's enough for me.

You Deserve My Praise

I had to post this video. I love this song by Tamela Mann aka Cora from "Madea's ......" Check out Myron Butler and Levi doing the background vocals. That girl can sang! Enjoy!

Fade to Black-September 20

Via Facebook:

To further support the injustice that is going on in Jena, Louisiana, we are asking that all supporters wear all black on Sept. 20th which is the day of Mychal Bell's sentencing.If you are not able to make it to the march in Jena, one of the many ways to show your support. It is a must that everyone support the cause by any means. This is history in the making, so don't let this be another time for you to sit back and watch. I'm encouraging to be the change that they want to see. Research the Jena 6 story and Stand up for the same rights that we have that were taken away from these boys.

Get up, get out and do something.

-Management

A Thin Line Between...

It's true that I don't like discussing too much of the love life (or the lack thereof) on this blog. Most times, it could make for an interesting post, but I'm always having conflicting thoughts about relationships. I don't want to sound like a ranting lunatic, so I just opt out.

After a recent conversation (just hung up) with The General (my mama, not my man), I am forced to think about some things. As if I didn't have these same thoughts just this weekend! Me and the youngin are still going. I wouldn't say strong, but we're going. Let me do a disclaimer by saying that I have and probably always will be a late bloomer. From everything boobs (still don't really have those, but they'll do) to sex to relationships, I was late. I'm not trippin either. Just the facts of my life.

At the ripe age of 26, I've tried to play Big Girl (a phase I should have gone through years ago) and say that I'm good where we are--doing what we do. It was even me who suggested it, making assumptions about how I thought he felt about being with me. We're on that fine line of togetherness and not-so. We hang out, we like each other, we talk everyday, etc. It was going well for about two weeks, but Big Girl, I am not. I am one big ball of emotion---a pansy, as my best male friend calls it. In a week or two I've gone from trying to have a "some strings attached" relationship, to outright wanting him to be my "boyfriend" to wanting to be done with it, PERIOD. Your boy has made it semi-clear that he's so content with our status (and why wouldn't he be?). That made me think: Hmmm, he has some years left in the game. I know what I was about at 23--FUN! Age 27 is around the corner and it's time for something serious. Atleast a little serious.

I'm thinking I could playing myself. I think it may be time to draw the line and just stop doing whatever I'm doing with him. No harm intended. Like Keysha said, that's just the way it is.

I discussed it with some friends and they said I could be jumping to conclusions or even sabotaging something pretty good. I don't even know.

Do I believe that just because 30 is closer than close that I should have a man to be complete? Absolutely not! But it would be nice. I'm patient and trusting in God to send me who He wants me to have. Perhaps this experience was simply to open my emotions up. Remember, I DO have the emotion of a rock, according to some people! I think I'm over that now. Sometimes it's not your emotions out of whack so much as it is the person you're dealing with.

So, it's time for that good chat. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Dear John Letter

As I opened the sealed letter and read the first line, my heart began to pound. I could feel the sweat beads form on my forehead. The letter read, "This is the hardest letter I've had to write in my career..."

My gynecologist broke up with me.

Yep, he's moving...to Savannah, Tennessee. Where the hell is that?

You don't understand. He was like the ideal boyfriend: intelligent, knowledgeable, knows my body, makes me feel at ease, caring, dependable and footed the bill.

DAMN!

Nevermind that he was a hairy white man probably about my mama's age. I was willing to overlook that.

Let me break it down. When I was 23 years old, I moved back home (what I thought would be temporarily) because they found a cyst on my ovary and was diagnosed with endometriosis. Since I'd just turned 23 a month earlier, insurance was non-existent and supposedly surgery was mandatory to remove it. Yeah, it was bigger than a nerf ball and I ain't that big (at all). After begging and pleading at the clinic and Church Health Center (for low-income, uninsured folks), I was referred to a doctor. He tested me, gave me the facts and performed the surgery for FREE. $100,000 surgery for FREE.99. God is able.

He told me for some reason I was one of his special patients. After surgery, I decided to keep him as my OBGYN. He always looked after me and would always tell me to "use condoms and be careful out there." Okie dokie. Pap smears and check-ups were no longer dreaded. He was just a good doctor, ya know? Even after I got a job with health insurance, he still waived the co-pays.

Now he's leaving and I'm back on the market. Nobody understands me like Dr. Thayer...This is just as bad as finding a new hairdresser.

Farewell, my love!

The search begins.

I'm Still Here!!!!

Long time, no blog, huh? It's been so much going on, I couldn't get it all out. Let's go down the list, shall we?

I just got back from the Chicago Football Classic (THE Southern University vs. Mississippi Valley State U.) We won, of course! I had so much fun with my two friends/LS in the CHI. It was like freshmen year all over again--atleast for three hours.

We also saw The Color Purple. EXCELLENT!! Sunday morning worship at Victory Cathedral (Smokie Norful's church) was so wonderful! Pics coming soon.

I was made aware of a certain co-worker's schemes against me. Supposedly this "backstabbing heffa" (someone else words, not mine!) is not to be trusted. How ironic that I share an office with her. Go figure. I was upset about it at first, but I'm so over it. Live and learn.

I started my teaching gig last week and one of students is my god-mother's best friend. She's known me forever. Now I'm teaching her. Weird. All of the other students are college-age. Blank slates....

I'm still looking for other side gigs, still writing and still looking for full-time jobs. It's hard, but I thank God that I'm in the position to do that without any major urgency. I'm the only one who should be make future situations urgent. If anyone knows of any PR/communications/special events jobs, let me know!

Email stalking, Myspacing and Facebooking works! I found the online editor at Vibe Vixen again. No, the print is not coming back anytime soon, except for a special issue, but the website will be updated.

I took a shot in the dark yesterday and sent an email tip about the Teedra Moses story to Stereohyped and she (Lauren, Tia William's sister) published it. Now that's hot!

Check out Clutch for more updates on Fashion Week and a new online mag, Empress Magazine.

I decided yesterday to put myself on the market for freelance writing. I've been surfing the net, seeing what other people are doing and I can do it, too! I need a website and a few other things to get it rolling. I'm excited.

Um, that's it. Nothing too enlightening or heavy. I'll get into that later.

Ciao'

Clutch Time

Clutch Magazine's sixth issue hit the internet waves today. I have been anticipating reading my own article (it's not conceited thing--I critique my own writing!) on my favorite girl, Teedra Moses. It was so great talking to her. Anyway, read that in your spare time this weekend, but the issue is filled with so much more interesting stuff.

Dede Sutton's Editor's note

Sanaa Lathan interview

Eric Roberson

Teach the Babies

10 Ways to Find a Mate

You get the picture. It's a great issue.

Have a blessed weekend, people!